Trying to Move Forward ~ Fire Update (3/2)

So we have been in the trailer now for a little over a week, today marks 2 weeks to the day of our second house fire, and we are all still trying to cope with the loss of our 2 four legged boys, and one of our cats.  Going from a 3000 plus square foot home to a 500 square foot trailer, is taking a lot of getting used to.  The words "sorry" are thrown about hourly, as someone is constantly bumping into someone else. 

Unfortunately, we have been through this before, and although it was devastating, we didn't lose any pets in the first fire.  The first fire really taught us about the value of material items, and that pretty much everything can be replaced, and I often think that, maybe it had happened to teach us exactly that. 

This fire.  I don't know what it was or is supposed to teach us.   I have always been a believer that "Everything happens for a reason." and I just cannot wrap my head around this one.  I cannot wrap my head around the fact that I do not have my boys here with me.  The quietness of each morning without them has been deafening.  To walk down the hallway in the morning and not have 2 dogs basically up my butt is uncomprehendable.

I am at a loss.  While I am deeply saddened by losing the three animals, I am most saddened by losing my Boon.  By no means am I discounting anyone's relationship with a pet, and I have had many different pets growing up and in my adulthood and loved every single one of them; however, there is a special bond with a Mastiff, and unless you have owned  one has owned you,  it is difficult to describe.  When people speak of their human-like traits,  guilt complexes, and their big mushy smiles, you really don't fully understand unless you have experienced the "Mastiff Experience" first hand. 

Through all of this, my daughters came home from school yesterday, with some papers.  They were both nominated for the National Junior Honor Society, and we couldn't be more proud of them.  They are the reason my husband and I continue to move forward each day, and try to once again rebuild our lives from the ground, up.  For a second time.

And....  After talking with my husband, we both know that our house is not, and will not be a home without another one of those goofy Mastiff faces running around it, enlightening all our lives, which is why, once we are able to move back into the house in several months, we will be looking for....

TWO new Mastiff additions.  (Because they are like potato chips, you can't have just one!) 


and yes, just thinking about what it will be like, has given us something to look forward to, and begin to once again smile.